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I, the drunken master, began my training upon entering the University of Kentucky. As a diligent student I pursued drunkenness head on. I searched out the wisdom of many elders and parties. Many imparted bits of wisdom to me and to those who joined on my quest for alcohol enlightenment. I prospered on my journey but grew tired of the lack of discipline of those around me as I journeyed on my quest. Searching for an answer, I came to join the Phi Kappa Tau fraternity. There I was taken under the wing of grandmaster Jason Huber and grandmaster Mat Haggar. Under their tutelage I prospered on my dream to consume alcohol in mass quantities. I learned the finer points of drunkenness such as the Keg Stand and the Funneling. I had reached the clairvoyance of the drunken haze and have become the drunken master.
Patience grasshopper and you will learn the art of Beer-Fu.
